My dentist hates me because I don’t floss.
My doctor hates me because I eat fast food.
My doctor hates me because I don’t exercise.
My doctor hates me because I don’t. sleep. enough.
My boss hates me because I’m always groggy.
My coworkers hate me because I’m not friendly enough.
My clients hate me because I take too long to work.
My friends hate me because I don’t spend enough time with them.
My family hates me because I don’t spend enough time with them.
My spouse hates me because I don’t spend enough time with him.
My guests hate me because I don’t clean enough.
My critics hate me because I don’t practice enough.
Everyone hates me because I can’t find the right balance.
If I could only find the right balance I could be perfect.
But none of this is true.
No one hates me.
I’m the one who hates me.
Because it feels like I can’t do anything right.
I’m diagnosed with anxiety, depression, and ADHD. It’s something I’ve been learning about and learning to work with on a daily basis. I wrote this poem in an attempt to explain what anxiety and depression can sometimes feel like. Maybe it will help someone else struggling with similar problems. Or maybe it will help others to better understand.
I think it’s important to note that these aren’t necessarily things that I (or anyone with anxiety or depression) believe. Rather, it’s what anxiety and depression try to make us believe. It’s like someone following you around and whispering these things in your ear, and you know it’s a lie, but you can’t help but wonder because it won’t stop talking. So no, I don’t believe everyone hates me (or anyone, for that matter). And I don’t actually hate myself. But when my depression gets really bad, there are times where it really does feel that way.